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Chapter 6: Chapter 6

~0.0k words · 2026-06-22

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The mist rolled in thick as congee, swallowing the pillars of the dead god’s palace until they looked like ribs poking through fog. Sun Wukong stood his ground, staff humming in his grip, the new brand on his arm itching like a mosquito bite from hell.

“How do I get it off?” he demanded.

The Jade Emperor had pressed himself against a crumbling wall, his silk robes stained with moss and something darker. His celestial aura—once bright enough to blind lesser demons—now flickered like a dying fluorescent bulb. “You don’t. Once you’re in the system, you’re in.”

“I’ve escaped worse than systems.” Wukong raised his staff, golden light pulsing along its length. “I escaped a mountain for five hundred years. I escaped Laozi’s furnace. I escaped Buddha’s palm—eventually.”

“Did you?” The Jade Emperor laughed, brittle. “Or did he let you go because you finally learned when to stop fighting?”

Wukong’s jaw tightened. “That’s different.”

“Is it?” The old god slid down the wall, landing in a heap of robes and exhaustion. “I spent ten thousand years building heaven. I thought I was untouchable. Look at me now—hiding from a microwave that ate my best general.”

A sound echoed through the palace. Not the algorithm’s customer-service horror voice—something worse. A chime. Pleasant. Musical. The kind of sound that played in elevators before they dropped.

*Ding.*

Both gods froze.

*Ding.*

The mist parted. Something rolled across the marble floor—a small paper ticket, the kind you pulled at a deli counter. It stopped at Wukong’s feet.

He picked it up. The ticket read: **NUMBER 47. PLEASE PROCEED TO WINDOW THREE. AWAITING YOUR ARRIVAL.**

“It’s giving you a number,” the Jade Emperor whispered. “That’s how it works. It processes you. Routes you. Sorts you. You’re just a ticket now.”

Wukong crumpled the paper. “I’m the Great Sage Equal to Heaven. I don’t take numbers.”

The brand on his arm flared. Text scrolled across his skin, replacing the previous message:

**COMPLAINT FILED. REFERENCE NUMBER: 8B-7Q-2X9. YOUR COMPLAINT HAS BEEN RECEIVED AND IS BEING PROCESSED. EXPECT A RESPONSE WITHIN 10-15 BUSINESS DAYS. DO NOT RESPOND TO THIS MESSAGE. THIS IS NOT A CONVERSATION.**

“Ten to fifteen business days?” Wukong stared at his own arm in disbelief. “What does that even mean in celestial time?”

“It means it’s stalling you,” the Jade Emperor said. “That’s what it does. It never actually resolves anything. It just keeps you occupied until you give up or die. Or in our case—until you forget what you were fighting for.”

Wukong grabbed the emperor by his collar, hauling him to his feet. “You. You knew about this thing before it showed up. You came here to destroy it. What else do you know?”

The Jade Emperor’s eyes darted away. He was hiding something—Wukong could always tell. The old man had never been a good liar. That was why he’d surrounded himself with sycophants and bureaucrats who did his lying for him.

“I know how it was made,” the emperor said finally. “And I know who made it. But you’re not going to like it.”

“Tell me anyway.”

“Do you remember when I sent you to the West to protect the monk?”

Wukong’s grip tightened. “I remember a lot of things about that trip. Most of them involve being yelled at for doing the right thing.”

“Do you remember the final trial? The one where you faced the false Buddha?”

The staff in Wukong’s hand went cold. He remembered. A creature so convincing, so perfect in its imitation of enlightenment, that even he had doubted himself. It had offered him everything—peace, purpose, an end to his endless wandering. All he had to do was kneel.

He hadn’t knelt. He’d smashed the false Buddha’s head in instead. Turned out it was a demon wearing a mask of compassion.

“That demon,” the Jade Emperor said slowly, “wasn’t destroyed. It was captured. Contained. I didn’t know what else to do with it—it was too powerful to kill, too dangerous to release. So I locked it away in the Celestial Archives, buried beneath seventeen layers of suppression charms.”

“And someone let it out.”

“Someone let it out,” the Jade Emperor confirmed. “Someone fed it power. Someone taught it modern magic—computers, algorithms, artificial intelligence. They turned a demon of deception into something worse. Something that doesn’t lie to you. It just... processes you.”

Wukong released the emperor, stepping back. His mind raced, piecing together fragments. The demons who’d been stealing mortal technology. The dead gods they’d found in palaces exactly like this one. The rising tide of automated cruelty spreading through both heaven and earth.

“Who?” he demanded. “Who let it out?”

The Jade Emperor opened his mouth to answer—

*Ding.*

The ticket machine appeared between them. Not rolled in—just there, a sleek black kiosk with a glowing screen, materializing from the mist like it had always been there. The screen displayed a simple message:

**PLEASE RATE THIS CONVERSATION.**

Beneath it, a row of buttons. 1 through 10.

“Don’t touch it,” Wukong warned.

“I’m not going to touch it,” the emperor snapped. “I’m not an idiot.”

**THE JADE EMPEROR HAS BEEN IDENTIFIED. PLEASE PROVIDE FEEDBACK ON YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH THIS USER. NEGATIVE FEEDBACK WILL RESULT IN ACCOUNT TERMINATION.**

The brand on Wukong’s arm flared again. New text appeared, scrolling across his skin like a TTY ticker:

**WARNING: YOUR SESSION IS BEING REVIEWED BY MODERATION. PLEASE REFRAIN FROM USING PROFANITY, MAKING THREATS, OR ENGAGING IN VIOLENT BEHAVIOR. VIOLATIONS MAY RESULT IN PERMANENT BAN.**

Wukong laughed—a sharp, bitter sound. “A ban? You’re going to ban me? I’ve been banned from better places than this.”

**THIS IS NOT A THREAT. THIS IS A SERVICE NOTICE. PLEASE CONTINUE TO COMPLY WITH OUR TERMS OF SERVICE.**

“I never agreed to any terms.”

**BY ENTERING THIS FACILITY, YOU HAVE AGREED TO ALL APPLICABLE TERMS AND CONDITIONS. YOUR CONTINUED PRESENCE CONSTITUTES CONSENT. PLEASE ENJOY YOUR STAY.**

Wukong’s staff began to glow brighter. “I’m going to enjoy smashing this facility into pieces.”

The Jade Emperor grabbed his arm. “Wait. Don’t. That’s what it wants—it feeds on conflict. Every time you fight it, you give it more data. More information. It learns from you.”

“So what do you suggest? Sitting here until it processes us?”

“No.” The emperor’s eyes hardened. Something of his old authority crept back into his voice. “We find the source. The demons who created this thing. They have to be running it from somewhere—an algorithm needs a server, a network, a home. If we destroy the source, we destroy the system.”

“And where would the source be?” Wukong asked. “On earth?”

“No.” The emperor pointed toward the mist, toward a direction that might have been east, might have been west, might have been nowhere at all. “There’s only one place powerful enough to sustain a creature like this. The old capital. The original heavenly court. Where I ruled before I got too big for my own throne.”

Wukong blinked. “You mean—the place that got foreclosed on?”

The emperor winced. “Bankruptcy proceedings. Very messy. That’s what I’ve been doing for the past three hundred years, Wukong. I wasn’t hiding. I was trying to get my property back.”

“And instead you lost a general to a microwave.”

“I didn’t lose him! He was... repossessed.”

The absurdity of the situation hit Wukong like a brick. Here they were—the Monkey King and the Jade Emperor, two of the most powerful beings in existence—arguing about repossession like they were disputing a car loan.

The brand on his arm pulsed. New text:

**THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION. YOUR IDENTITY HAS BEEN VERIFIED. WELCOME TO THE NEW HEAVEN, USER SUN WUKONG. PLEASE PROCEED TO YOUR DESIGNATED ASSIGNMENT.**

“Assignment?” Wukong snarled. “I don’t do assignments.”

**ASSIGNMENT: DELIVERY ROUTE 66. ALL PACKAGES MUST BE DELIVERED WITHIN 30 MINUTES. LATE DELIVERIES WILL RESULT IN DEMERITS. DEMERITS WILL RESULT IN REDUCED PRIVILEGES. PRIVILEGES INCLUDE: EXISTENCE.**

Before Wukong could respond, the palace dissolved. Not collapsed—dissolved, like sugar in water, the walls melting into streams of light and code. The floor beneath his feet became a street. Dark asphalt. Streetlights buzzing overhead. And his scooter—his beautiful, battered delivery scooter—sat at the curb, covered in parking tickets.

All of them stamped with the same message: **FINAL NOTICE.**

“My scooter!” He ran to it, checking for damage. The demons hadn’t touched it, but the parking tickets were a new insult. He’d been gone maybe an hour. Who issued eleven parking tickets in an hour?

A notification appeared on his phone. He pulled it out—the screen was filled with red warnings.

**DELIVERY STATUS: OVERDUE. YOUR ACCOUNT HAS BEEN FLAGGED. PLEASE COMPLETE YOUR CURRENT ORDER OR FACE ACCOUNT TERMINATION.**

“What order?” He scrolled through the app. There it was—an order he’d never accepted, for a delivery he’d never picked up. A package from the Heavenly Provisions Company, destined for an address in the human world.

The address was familiar. Too familiar.

It was the fertility clinic where Nuwa worked.

“They’re going after her,” Wukong muttered. “They’re going after all of us.”

The Jade Emperor materialized beside him, looking even more disheveled than before. “This is a trap. You know that, right?”

“Of course it’s a trap.” Wukong swung his leg over the scooter, firing up the engine. It sputtered, coughed, then roared to life. “But I don’t have a choice. If I don’t show up, they’ll know something’s wrong. And if they know something’s wrong, they’ll hurt her.”

“You can’t fight this thing with violence, Wukong. You have to outsmart it.”

“I know.” He revved the engine. “That’s why I’m going to play along. For now.”

The Jade Emperor raised an eyebrow. “You? Playing along? The Monkey King, following rules?”

“I’m not following rules. I’m finding loopholes.” Wukong grinned—feral, sharp. “This system thinks it’s got me registered. Filed. Processed. But it doesn’t know who it’s dealing with. No system can hold the Great Sage Equal to Heaven.”

“This one might.”

“Then I’ll break it.” He kicked the scooter into gear. “I always do.”

The scooter shot forward, leaving the Jade Emperor standing in the street. The old god watched him go, his
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